Friday talk recorded on 23rd October 2020
Our Collective Shame
- South Africa is reported as of the countries with the highest rape statistics in the world
- 70% of women feel unsafe when walking public
- Up to 40% of South African women have experienced sexual and/or physical abuse
- Over 30% of children experienced some form of sexual abuse
- Very small number is reported
How many in our closest circles have experienced
- Physical force
- Unwanted touching
- Unwanted comments
- Unwanted looks
Strongest Condemnation
- This is of the greatest of sins
- If looking is haram than how much worse is more than that
- The rights of the weak and vulnerable are the strongest in the eyes of Allah
- The last advice of the prophet (s)
- The culprit is an oppressor
- A person in a position of trust is so much more reprehensible
Beware of the supplication of the oppressed, for there is no barrier between it and Allah. Source: Ṣaḥīḥ al-Bukhārī 4090
- Penalty for rape is execution
- Allah’s retribution in these crimes in this world and the next is most sever
- This crimes gets exposed
Speak Out
“Whosoever of you sees an evil action, let him change it with his hand; and if he is not able to do so, then with his tongue; and if he is not able to do so, then with his heart – and that is the weakest of faith.”
Sahih Muslim
It is your duty your jihad to expose and hold the culprit to justice
Allah’s Messenger صلى الله عليه وسلم( ) said, “Help your brother, whether he is an oppressor or he is an oppressed one. People asked, “O Allah’s Messenger صلى الله عليه وسلم( ) It is all right to help him if he is oppressed, but how should we help him if he is an oppressor?” The Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم( ) said, “By preventing him from oppressing others.”
Bukhari
Covering the Faults of Others?
It was narrated that Abu Hurayrah (may Allah be pleased with him) said:
The Messenger of Allah (blessings and peace of Allah be upon him) said:
Narrated by Muslim (2699)
“Whoever removes a worldly hardship from a believer, Allah will remove one of the hardships of the Day of Resurrection from him. Whoever grants respite to (a debtor) who is in difficulty, Allah will grant him relief in this world and in the Hereafter. Whoever conceals (the fault of) a Muslim in this world, Allah will conceal him (his faults) in this world and in the Hereafter. Allah will help a person so long as he is helping his brother.”
If the sin affects the rights of another person, such as if he sees him stealing from someone’s house or shop, or he sees him committing adultery with the wife of So and so, then it is not permissible for him to cover up for him
If we do not stop them more and more lives will be destroyed by our inaction
Applaud and Support those who Speak Up
Abu Sa’id al-Khudri reported: The Prophet, peace and blessings be upon him, said,
“Verily, among the greatest acts of jihad is a word of justice in front of a tyrant.”
Source: Sunan al-Tirmidhī 2174
Those who speak up give a voice to countless silent sufferers and save countless more potential victims
Social Media Accusations
IMPORTANCE OF VERIFYING INFORMATION “O you who believe! If a Faasiq (liar - evil person) comes to you with any news, verify it, lest you should harm people in ignorance, and afterwards you become regretful for what you have done” Surah Al Hujuraat 49:6
يَا أَيُّ هَا الَّذِينَ آمَنُوا إِنْ جَاءكَُمْ فَاسِقٌ بِنَبَإٍ فَ تَبَ يَّ نُوا أَنْ تُصِيبُوا قَ وْمًا بِجَهَالَةٍ فَ تُصْبِحُوا عَلَىٰ مَا فَ عَلْتُمْ نَادِمِينَ
The Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said:
Narrated by Muslim in al-Muqaddimah, 6; Saheeh al-Jaami, 4482
“It is enough lying for a man to speak of everything that he hears.”
He said: I heard the Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) say:
Importance of Verifying Information
“How bad it is for a man to keep saying, ‘They say…’. ”
Al-Silsilah al-Saheehah, 866
“The believer reserves judgement until the matter is proven.”
Al-Hasan al-Basri said:
Innocent until proven guilty
Why have the normal channels failed?
Swept under the Rug
- When predators can operate for decades or predators are allowed to offend repeatedly then our system is broken
- When the victim does not feel safe to tell their family or community leaders our system is broken
- When the victim does report the crime but nothing ever happens to the predator our system is broken
When we blame and shame the victim eg.
- Why were you there
- What were you wearing
- Why didn’t you say anything earlier
When we care more about the honour of a rapist and molester than an innocent person we are part of the problem
- When we silence the victim we are an accomplice
- This is not protecting the dignity of Islam but rather tarnishes the image of Islam
We Stand by You!
- If you have been harmed then speak up privately or publicly
- If someone in the position of authority over you (a parent, a teacher, religious leader, boss, etc) ever assaulted you then speak up
- Remember the story of Yusuf (AS)
Advice to all of us
Protect your Children
- Monitor them especially holiday time
- Most crimes against children are by friends or relatives
Bukhari
–Hadith: “…the brother in-law is destruction”
In every home
- Do not leave them alone
- Teach them of inappropriate touching and looking
- If ever they complain to you support them. If they can not confide in you then who can they turn to
- Look at their attitude towards certain adults
Reforms Needed
Role of imams:
- Most muslims turn to their imams as their first port of call
- Sabr and silence is not the way
- We need to create a safe and dignified platform for victims to report their abuse
We call upon community leaders, counsellors, doctors, lawyers, etc. to create a support structure
A survey should be done in all schools especially religious institutions into this issues
Beware of Private Sins
“I certainly know people of my ummah who will come on the Day of Resurrection with good deeds like the mountains of Tihaamah, but Allah will make them like scattered dust.”
Narrated by Ibn Maajah (4245); classed as saheeh by al-Albaani in Saheeh Ibn Maajah
Thawbaan said: “O Messenger of Allah, describe them to us and tell us more, so that we will not become of them unknowingly.”
He said: “They are your brothers and from your race, worshipping at night as you do, but they will be people who, when they are alone, transgress the sacred limits of Allah.”
Repent
“And those who, when they have committed Fahishah (illegal sexual intercourse) or wronged themselves with evil, remember Allah and ask forgiveness for their sins; — and none can forgive sins but Allah — and do not persist in what (wrong) they have done, while they know” Surah Aal ‘Imran 3:135
وَالَّذِينَ إِذَا فَ عَلُوا فَاحِشَةً أَوْ ظَلَمُوا أَنْ فُسَهُمْ ذكََرُوا اللَّهَ فَاسْتَ غْفَرُوا لِذُنُوبِهِمْ وَمَنْ يَ غْفِرُ الذُّنُوبَ إِلََّّ اللَّهُ وَلَمْ يُصِرُّوا عَلَىٰ مَا فَ عَلُوا وَهُمْ يَ عْلَمُونَ
“And whoever does evil or wrongs himself but afterward seeks Allah’s forgiveness, he will find Allah Oft Forgiving, Most Merciful” Surah Al Nisa 4:110
وَمَنْ يَ عْمَلْ سُوءًا أَوْ يَظْلِمْ نَ فْسَهُ ثُمَّ يَسْتَ غْفِرِ اللَّهَ يَجِدِ اللَّهَ غَفُورًا رَحِيمًا
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